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From a new tome on Play


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"A SAFE SPACE Your game group needs to make you feel safe. This is a step beyond just being comfortable while playing the game. This is a safe space free of hassle, harassment, negativity, judgment, and unfriendly behavior in general, both in and out of the game. You should never have to be worried or anxious at the game table."

Not sure what even to make of this paragraph? Gaming with kids involves tears. It's okay. Kids are mean and tears part of growing up. Adults will also get angry. Be nice if they didn't, but we're human (apes).

(Don't ever idiot me again.)

Let me add something to the advice. "Please leave" or better still, "say something right then." A simple, "you're making me uncomfortable," helps. Also, playing with strangers is rewarding, but not every date goes well.

Leave bad play. Try a Better Game which makes the time investment less. But no game should be a conflict free zone. I'm not even sure you want it to always be welcoming. Can people have a crappy day occasionally and come back next week and apologize? Or be allowed to vent during a session. Then the norms of the social group will come into play. but to tell everyone they have a right to validation is wrong. It leads to self centered actions. These are group experiences.

Find the group is not your norms? Change them or leave. It's okay to not play with people you dislike. It's also okay for them not to want to play with you. There are many people I dislike playing with. I don't suffer fools.

There are many groups to form. Find your clique. And toughen up some -- you'll live longer being less interested in finding safe places.



Yours,

   red



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Market has Spoken for Monte Cook -- red (posted: 7/1/2019) 
 
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